Royal Jedi
by Faldon113
Summary: Sequel to Avatar Jedi and won't make sense if you haven't read that first. Anakin is, finally, happy. She's back with the Jedi, she has a padawan, and everything is starting to look good for her. At least, until her past comes back to bite her hard. Now she has to make the hardest decision of her life because the only way to save her friends is to give up being a Jedi.
1. Prologue

**Reluctant Return**

The shuttle was silent as I piloted through the mountains. Even at the best of times, Cody wasn't much of a talker, but I was grateful for his silence now. With my emotions churning everywhere, I don't think I could stand chatter. Even R2D2 was silent, sitting in the back. For all I knew, it could have powered itself down, trying to escape the proverbial black cloud that seemed to hang over us. Not the best mindset to be in, all things considered.

"What do you think?" I finally asked, needing to distract myself from the dark thoughts that were starting to creep in. "As someone whose never been on this planet before, what's your first impression?"

"It's beautiful," the clone answered noncommittally, looking out the window again. "Feels Darker then I was expecting though, considering the disposition of Caelum and yourself."

As he spoke, the shuttle moved around the final peak and the palace was displayed in all it's shimmering, ominous, horrible glory before us. The sight made my throat catch, and not in a good way. Despite the decades spent away, I couldn't forget my dislike for this place. My hatred. "We're the exception," I muttered to my friend, prepping the shuttle for landing. "Not the rule. Not here." The VanGuards were waiting at the landing site, white eyes glinting at us from the black masks. No matter how much I braced myself, the sight made me flinch. Those faces stalked my nightmares, and I couldn't believe that I was willing returning to their lair. "Do me a favor," I said tightly as we set down. "Stay close."

"Of course, Commander Skywalker," the clone replied, remaining seated until the ship was fully settled on the ground. Only once the engines had shut down did he unstrap himself, grabbing his pack as the entrance port hissed open. He and the recently awakened R2 waited patiently as I gathered my things and gave the shuttle controls a last going over. Only once I was confidant that everything was locked down did I disembark, clone and droid behind me.

We were greeted by the VanGuard, as I knew we would be. The black-masked soldiers bowed as I approached, not moving until I had stopped before them. "Well met, captain," I said briskly to the leader, voice clear of any dislike. The Order had certainly refined my diplomatic skills, at the least. "I assume you are here to escort us?" The leader nodded, white eyes glinting in the strong morning sun. By the Force, I hated those masks. "Thank you, but we don't require your services. Remain at your post." I knew they wouldn't obey; it was a political game that was common amongst all palace residents. So when I moved to walk by the squad, it was no surprise that they moved as a unit to follow.

Facing the leader fully, I allowed the slightest of frowns to cross my face. It was time to remind these people who I was. "Last time I checked, my legs were still in working order, captain, so I do not require your help to walk. Only a fool could get lost with the palace towering over us as it is, so I don't need a guide. Your services are not needed so _remain at your post._ " After a quick battle of wills, the captain inclined his head, stepping back. With a sharp nod, not allowing my face to show my disgust for the games I was forced to play with these people, I turned to continue on the path to the stairs, Cody and R2 behind me. With a slight twist of the Force, I was able to levitate the droid in order to avoid leaving it behind on the steep staircase. To its credit, it made no sound of protest.

A few steps up, I paused and turned back to the watching VanGuard. "Oh, and captain? You might want to tell the scientists to keep their distance for a while." White eyes glinted at me as he nodded before I turned around to resume climbing.

It wasn't until we were out of the VanGuard's hearing range that Cody queried, "Scientists?"

"Do loud noises bother you?" I asked in reply, stubbornly looking forward as I tried to concentrate. The Force was nearly vibrating from all the Sith above us. Looking back at my early life, I couldn't believe that I hadn't noticed them before.

"You know they do not, Commander Skywalker," the clone answered, not bothered that I had ignored his question. If only more people acted like clones. "Part of our training on Kamino was to become accustomed to loud noises."

"Good," I replied simply. A few seconds later, the ground shook from a large explosion behind us. As expected, Cody didn't even flinch, though he did look over his shoulder with a neutral expression. I didn't even do that much, focusing completely on climbing the stairs. Levitating something up a steep incline wasn't exactly easy. Only once everything had settled once more did I explain, "During my time on the moon, I learned that Earth scientists can get information from anything tech. I didn't want them learning or gaining anything from the shuttle." Seeing the military logic of my words, the clone nodded before focusing forward again, shifting closer to me as a small squad of regular soldiers hurried past us to investigate the explosion. The disruption was enough that he didn't have time to ask why I had saved the scientists by giving warning. Despite living with the Jedi for so long, he was still a solider. He couldn't afford mercy. And now, more than ever, I couldn't afford to not be merciful.

The stairs stretched on, seeming to never end. Cody and I remained silent, finding no reason to talk. Everything that had needed to be discussed had been covered prior to landing. Now we just walked, conserving our energy for the trials ahead. Even R2 was quiet as it bobbed along behind me, though I could hear it's dome swiveling around as it looked about. The mood of the entire group was rather somber, but somehow managed to take a nose-dive as we finally reached the top and stepped on the plateau, seeing the palace up close for the first time.

"I hate this place," I muttered, surprising Cody as I lowered R2 back onto solid ground. It had been a long time since he'd heard any Jedi claim to hate something; it wasn't our way and he knew it. However, it was a sentiment he was going to have to get used to. There wasn't much I didn't hate here.

Passing more squads of VanGuards, we entered the monstrous palace, keeping very close to each other. Regardless of training, I could see that Cody was uncomfortable. The palace had been designed to make even the bravest beings nervous. It was made completely out of some black stone that I had never been able to identify. Full of sharp edges and cruel decorations, it was not the most welcoming of places. That didn't even account for the slaves. There weren't many, but they moved about us silently, each focused fully on their task while pretending to be invisible. Even child slaves could be seen, little more than skin and bones.

With hands locked behind my back, I strode down the hall with my head raised, hoping no one besides Cody would notice my disease. This was a place I'd escaped from, hid from, and sworn to never return to. Being back left a bitter taste in my mouth and a shadow on my heart. Seeing the slaves again was worse than I'd thought it would be. I knew what it was like to be a slave, now. To be seen as less than human. I wanted to meet their eyes, smile at them, thank them, apologize to them. But I couldn't.

"Commander Skywalker," Cody said quietly, breaking the silence between us as we approached the large doors at the end of the hall. "Are you sure about this?"

Pausing a few steps from the door, I looked up. Most people thought the doors were blank and smooth, but I knew otherwise. In the right place, with the right light, the faint carvings could be seen, revealing a mighty and horrible dragon. It stood, towering over a village that was in flames with it's wings extended and it's head thrown back in a roar of triumph. Blood dripped from the open mouth and bodies were scattered about the ground, all that remained of the rampage. There had been a time when I'd though the dragon was my guardian and what I strived to be when I grew up. A mighty warrior that destroyed its enemies and rejoiced in their defeat. Now I knew it to be my demon, the one thing I could never afford to be. "No Cody, I'm not. But I don't have much of a choice." Glancing back at the stoic man, I tried to smile. "Thanks for coming this far with me. I'll understand if you don't want to go any farther."

Giving me a flat look, the clone spread his legs slightly in order to stand easier and settled into place. It was a stance I knew well as all clones had used it in both wars. He wasn't going anywhere. With a whistle of agreement, R2 rolled into place beside him, adding an insulting cheep towards me. That brought a real smile to my face and I nodded to them both before facing the door again. The smile couldn't survive in the face of my past, but the warmth in my chest persevered. "Wait here." Knowing they would obey, I walked forward. When I got close enough, the doors swung open on their own, eerily silent. Beyond them lay the fire-lined path of the throne room. Shadows shifted behind the flames, marking the inhabitants of the room. Several watched me with hateful eyes as I walked down the aisle, but if they were hoping for me to falter, they were disappointed. After all, somethings never change.

Back straight and head held high, I ignored the shadows. This was no different than the tests of my childhood. Showing weakness here would be asking for a fight, and no self-respecting Jedi asked for conflict. Let them hate me as they wished, but I would not let it affect me.

Reaching the end of the hall, I looked up to the woman sitting on the ivory throne. She wasn't smirking, but I could feel the smugness rolling off of her. Yet another thing that would never change, apparently. Despite my Jedi training, I couldn't wait to be the one to make her fear, make her doubt everything. I would be the one to bring her to her knees; the one to make her afraid. Not yet though. For now, I bowed slightly, though I held her gaze firmly. Let everyone else think that I was being submissive. She and I knew otherwise. It wasn't until her eyes tightened in irritation that I allowed myself a small, challenging smile. "Hello, Grandmother. I'm back."


	2. Heir to Earth

**Heir to Earth**

 _If one were to read my history, they would never believe I could be a Jedi. I hardly believed it myself. If given enough time, I would probably be able to convince myself that it was all a happy dream. Luckily, Adam and Obi-wan never gave me that chance. They were constantly reminding me that it was the choice I'd made to be a Jedi that made me a Jedi. Unless I changed my mind, I would be a Jedi forever._

 _The Council agreed, apparently, as they allowed me to take the Trials of Knighthood soon after my rescue from Earth. I will never know how I passed, but I did. The day that Obi-wan cut my braid, the one that he had salvaged from my avatar body before it was burned, was the best day of my life._

 _That night was the worst. Waking up alone, in a strange apartment, I thought I was on Earth again. It wasn't the first time I'd woken up like that since my rescue, but before I could tug on my braid and ground myself. This time, my braid was gone. Being as I was still half-asleep, logic thought failed and I flew into a panic. The Force reacted to my fear and lashed out, destroying everything in the room. By the time Obi-wan managed to reach me and calm me down, I'd destroyed the apartment I'd been assigned and caused structural damage to that part of the temple._

 _I'd thought the Council would react negatively, but they were actually worried about me. Yoda helped counsel me and was the one to discover an anomaly within my mind. According to him, I'd been conditioned from a young age to have a slightly unbalanced mind and to react violently in certain situations. The training bond with Obi-wan had stabilized me slightly, though all of the Masters found themselves in awe of the self control that I possessed, considering this was the first time I'd ever lost control. I didn't have the heart to tell them that it was a survival technique that I'd had most of my life. That portion of my past was over and I didn't want to think about it again. So instead, I told them that it was military discipline that had helped me._

 _In the wake of the discovery, I moved back into the apartment I had shared with Obi-wan and a new bond was made between us, similar to the training bond but keeping the balance of power equal between us. I was assured that it wasn't a demotion and that I was still a Jedi Knight. However, it had already been noted that my former master and I were only truly comfortable when we were in close proximity of each other. Becoming a true team was a way to take care of all the problems with one action. And I must admit, neither of us were complaining about the situation. Slowly, life took on a semblance of normalcy as I resettled into my life as a Jedi. Then, during a fit of insanity, I did something I'd sworn I would never do._

 _I took a padawan._

* * *

The smell of Nerf bacon was usually pretty sweet, but the moment it started burning the scent would turn extremely repulsive. Anakin had learned that little fact the hard way when the smell had been burned into her nose as a padawan. So it was that the slightest hint of the smell viciously yanked her from her sleep. By the time her mind caught up with what she was doing, she'd bolted from her bedroom, snagged the pan of meat off the small stove, and shoved it under a stream of water in the sink. For a moment, time hung in suspension until she drooped over the counter. "Good morning, T'sul."

"I'm so sorry, Master Skywalker!" the young Twi'lek gushed, looking utterly mortified. "I just knew you'd returned late last night and wanted to make you breakfast, but didn't know what you liked, so I took this from the fridge, but I wasn't sure what it was, so I went to look it up, but I got distracted and the meat started to burn and-."

"It's alright, T'sul," the blonde sighed, pulling the pan from the water. The bacon had barely started to burn, leaving the meat still edible. "Your heart is in the right place. Nerf bacon is just difficult to cook. Took me years to master the technique myself." Placing the meat to the side, she turned to face her student. Not for the first time, she wondered what had possessed her to take a padawan learner in the first place.

The problem did not come from T'sul. He was unique, no doubt. His skin was a soft red color, rare even among his people that had more skin colors than most artist pallets. He was also very strong in the Force. Adam had spoke highly of the young Twi'lek for years. So no, the problem wasn't with T'sul.

The problem was Anakin. With all her baggage from Earth, her violent past, and her slightly skewed mind, she was probably the last person qualified to train a padawan. She didn't even like teaching that much, having to be bullied into leading general classes as was required for all knights.

Despite all that, the blonde knew it was the right thing to do. T'sul was not that different from her, in some regards. The Twi'lek had been on an apprentice class trip when the group had run into one of the few remaining Separatist groups. Of the fifty apprentices and the ten knights, only twelve apprentices and three knights survived. Anakin had been at the forefront in counseling the survivors, having plenty of experience with this sort of mental battle scars. In fact, she probably understood the survivors better than any other Jedi, thanks to her background. It was during these counseling sessions that she met T'sul for the first time.

She'd known of the young Twi'lek, of course, because of Adam. However, she'd never actually seen the young Jedi before. The picture that her friend had painted of the boy didn't even remotely match the broken shell the blonde eventually met. Honestly, she'd seen corpses that had looked more alive. Of all the survivors, T'sul had been the hardest to help. He'd basically shut himself down and it had taken months to convince him to live. Other Jedi counselors had been at a loss and weren't sure how to handle the boy, leaving his treatment almost entirely with Anakin. She met with him everyday, trying to convince him that his life hadn't ended during that trip and that he could move on; that the friends he'd lost would want him to keep going. Eventually, he had started to listen and heal, but he had almost no confidence in himself. He feared everything, and tried to distance himself from everyone – except for Anakin. She was the only being that he trusted and would listen to. So it made sense to take him as her padawan.

The choice was logical, but logic wasn't always easy. T'sul had moved in with Anakin and Obi-wan six months before and was still twitchy as hell. He apologized for everything, especially for things that were not his fault. Anakin wasn't sure what to do with him; she wasn't used to dealing with young people at all, let alone traumatized young people. It had never been something she'd needed to do before. Not as an avatar and certainly not as a soldier. Obi-wan kept insisting that she was doing fine and that T'sul would settle down and they'd find their rhythm.

It was moments like this that the blonde wondered if he was right. Not a single negative word had been spoken, yet the young Twi'lek looked like he expected her to lash out at him. There had been a time when Anakin had reveled in causing fear in others, but that time was long past. Now the sight saddened her. What was she doing wrong?

Seeing the other food laid out on the table, she gestured towards it. "You made all this?" The padawan nodded nervously. "Thank you," she said, trying to smile. "I'll take care of the bacon if you'll go rouse Obi-wan." The Twi'lek was gone before she could blink. Taking a moment to release her frustration into the Force, the blonde set about her task. She really needed to learn how to talk to her padawan.

By the time T'sul and Obi-wan emerged from the older Jedi's room, the bacon was on the table and ready to be eaten but the blonde was nowhere to be seen. Sighing, Obi-wan didn't bother checking the bond he shared with his former student. Anakin had already suffered through a stressful week, helping to negotiate between two warring cities on Tatooine, and likely couldn't face her padawan just then. Times like this would drive her to the one place she was always welcome.

"Don't you dare tell me you managed to injure yourself in the four hours since I saw you last," Master Bant drawled as Anakin stepped into her medical wing. "Even your luck is not that bad."

"I wouldn't bet on that," the blonde teased back, relaxing slightly. She and the ancient Master would never be close, but they were on friendly terms since the escape from Earth. It had actually been Bant who had had a new prosthetic arm built for the younger Jedi and helped with therapy as Anakin relearned how to use the contraption. "Actually, I'm just here to visit a friend." Smiling in understanding, the Master nodded and let the blonde pass by. The other Healers ignored her as Anakin made her way to the back of the wing. She'd become a common sight in the infirmary for assorted reasons so unless she was on a bed, most everyone ignored her.

Near the back of the wing, the blonde found the person she'd been looking for. "I always forget how tall you are," she complained, startling the man that hadn't noticed her approach. "Are you sure you're not part giant?"

"Very," Caelum laughed, allowing the blonde to give him a short hug. "To my knowledge, my ancestors were all pure human." Slapping her friend on the shoulder, Anakin jumped up to sit on the counter as he resumed his work, looking through a microscope at what appeared to be a blood sample. They fell into a comfortable silence, not feeling the need to talk. For a while, the blonde simply marveled at the change in Caelum, not least in the fact that he was standing and walking around. The Jedi were unable to heal his spinal injury as too many years had gone by, but instead had made him metal leg braces that acted much like the blonde's prosthetic. It had taken time, but the doctor was now fully independent of his chair. Another couple years and he'd be beating Anakin in races every day.

"Not that I'm unhappy to see you," Caelum said and he put down the pad he'd been using to record notes, "but why are you here? Are you running away again?" The blonde scowled but remained silent, giving her answer. "Aria," the scientist sighed.

"I know!" the Jedi groaned, hiding her face in her hands. "I just don't know what to do with him! I've never yelled at him, never raised my hand, I haven't even frowned at him, but he's still terrified of me." Caelum wasn't sure how to respond to that. He knew T'sul was trying to work through his issues while Anakin was tackling her own, which meant they weren't meshing well. Regardless, the scientist could see, as all Jedi could, that the blonde and Twi'lek were made for each other. The two just needed to hold on for a little while longer.

"Master Skywalker?" The two humans looked over to see T'sul standing awkwardly nearby. "Master Kiri wanted to discuss my work in combat class with you today." Checking her sigh, Anakin nodded and rose to follow her padawan. They walked in silence for a while until T'sul quietly said, "I'm sorry, Master."

Stopping in her tracks, the blonde took a deep breath before turning to face the younger Jedi. "Why?" she asked, not unkindly. Nevertheless, he still looked panicked. For the first time, Anakin didn't back off. Instead, she knelt down so that she was on the same level as her padawan. "Why are you apologizing, T'sul?"

"I don't want to be a burden, Master," the boy reluctantly admitted, tears welling in his eyes. Anakin's instincts, fine-tuned by years of interrogation, told her that she was closer to an answer then she had ever been before. After a moment, she decided to push a little farther.

"A teacher asking to see me does not make you a burden," she told him, holding his gaze. "Remind me to tell you about some of the times my teachers had to talk to Obi-wan about me. It happened more times than I care to remember." _That_ surprised T'sul, and a fleeting smile flashed across his face, echoed by his master. "Seriously, there was at least one a month." Then she turned serious again. "This isn't the first time you've apologized for something that is not your fault. Why?"

For a long time, it looked like T'sul would not answer. Anakin was just about to back off when the Twi'lek looked down in shame. "Everyone knows you were a soldier, Master Skywalker. You're the bravest person in the whole temple. You would never accept a coward for a student. Like me."

"Don't you think I can decide what I do or do not accept?" the blonde asked gently, puzzle pieces falling into place. "You're so sure I'll reject you that you're acting like you want me to. I keep asking this, but why? A wise man once told me, 'I might be a Jedi, but I can't read minds.' If anything is going to change, we need to talk." The middle of a busy hallway wasn't exactly where Anakin wanted to have this discussion, but she'd resigned herself to not getting everything you wanted a long time ago.

"I ran away," T'sul finally said, tears starting to flow from his eyes. "When we were attacked, I ran. I didn't try to fight or help or anything. I just ran away, like a coward!" The tears were flowing freely, breaking the blonde's heart. "You've been so nice, Master Skywalker, and helped so much and never pitied me or treated me differently. It was so good but I knew you'd eventually realize that I was a coward that would run away from a fight and wouldn't want anything to do with me."

The puzzle finally complete, Anakin reached up to dry her padawan's face. When his startled gaze met hers, she smiled gently. "I was fifteen when I was in my first battle," she whispered, her voice not carrying beyond him. "Five years older than you and coming from a much more violent past, but when the attack came, I ran. Nothing could have prepared me for the reality of battle; the reality that I could die at any moment. It took months of near constant battles before I learned to stand my ground, and years before I became an offensive fighter. When the Jedi call me a soldier, they are only seeing the result of years of training and fighting. They don't see the baby steps I had to take to get where I am now."

Taking a risk, the blonde lowered the shield that lay in her training bond with her padawan, allowing him to feel her emotions. The only way this would work is if he could _feel_ her honesty. "You're a ten-year-old Jedi, T'sul. When the attack occurred, you were an apprentice. I would no more expect you to fight than I would expect Earth to welcome me back. Running does not make you a coward. Even if it did, I'm perfectly capable of choosing who and what I will accept. I've chosen you and that won't change, so long as you're honest with me."

Part of Anakin's mind was cringing at the sheer cheesiness of her words, but they felt like the right things to say. Better, they were honest. Obi-wan had always said that honesty was the most important element in a relationship. If it meant fixing her relationship with T'sul, she'd be as cheesy as she need to be.

"Commander Skywalker!" The Jedi pair jumped in surprise, Anakin getting to her feet as she turned to face where the shout had come from. Cody was jogging towards them, face creased in a frown. That wasn't so strange, but the blaster on his hip was. Clones weren't supposed to be armed inside the temple. "You're needed in the War Chamber," the clone said, more serious than normal, something the blonde hadn't thought was possible.

Then his words caught up with her mind and she tensed. The War Chamber hadn't been used since her time as a spy. It was a last resort location for the Jedi and only to be used in times of war, as the name suggested. That it was open now was _not_ a good thing.

"Right," the blonde replied sharply, unaware of the change that came over her. No matter how many years passed, at her core, Anakin was a soldier. In the face of conflict, she would always revert to her past training, though her soldier persona was now tempered by her Jedi training. It was a strange dichotomy, to be sure. Fiercer than any other Jedi, more passive than any other soldier, but it was a quirk she had learned to embrace.

T'sul, on the other hand, had never seen his master in soldier mode. He knew her reputation (it wasn't exactly a secret amongst the Order anymore) but she'd never show him anything but her Jedi side. Now he knew why. Jedi Anakin was kind, patient, and welcoming. Soldier Anakin was harder, colder, and gave off a feeling of dangerous edges. But then she glanced at him, and a flash of warmth reappeared as she threw him an apologetic smile. In that moment, the Twi'lek started to understand what she'd been saying. Yes, she was a soldier, but she could choose what she accepted. She'd chosen him.

"T'sul, could you tell Master Kiri that I'll meet with him soon? I don't want to keep the Council waiting." Only the Council could open the War Chamber; Anakin couldn't think of anyone else that would request her presence there. The blonde wasn't exactly happy about leaving her padawan so soon after their 'heart-to-heart' but needs must. Luckily, the Twi'lek understood and nodded before racing off. Sparing a moment to watch him, Anakin allowed herself a moment of regret that their moment had ended, but then shook it off. This wasn't the time. Turning back to Cody, her smile turned sharp. "Lead the way." Nodding sharply, the clone turned back around and broke into a jog, the blonde on his heels. The Jedi in the hallway quickly got out of their way as the pair wound their way through the temple. Anakin was tempted to ask what had happened, but held her tongue. She'd know soon enough so there was no need to seek out bad news before she had to.

Reaching the Chamber, Anakin could see the door was still open. It wouldn't close until every summoned Jedi was inside. Nodding to Cody when the clone stopped to guard the door, she entered. As expected, the Council was waiting inside, along with a few other Jedi knights. They were split into small groups, conversing quietly amongst themselves as the blonde weaved between them. Spotting Obi-wan, she made her way over and was accepted seamlessly into his group where she was greeted. She returned the sentiments but remained silent, absorbing the conversations around her. It didn't take long for a dull chill to settle in her chest. This wasn't going to end well.

A silent chime signaled the beginning of the meeting, resulting in every Jedi taking a seat. Obi-wan noticed when Anakin shivered and pulled her robe tighter. Considering the entire temple was kept at a comfortable temperature, he frowned. "Are you alright?" he asked.

Forcing a fake smile, Anakin whispered, "The current just went cold. Like, Hoth cold." Remembering how she'd told him about the feelings she would get when change was coming, the elder slowly nodded. He'd already known the news was bad, now he had an idea of _how_ bad.

Master Windu stood up, instantly commanding attention. Not wasting time, he said, "The planet of Gali was attacked and destroyed 48 hours ago. We only received word this morning." Shock raced through the room, filling every Jedi with a sense of dread. Then Windu glanced at Anakin and she knew what he was about to say. "The aggressor was Earth."

The Chamber erupted into whispers while Anakin tried to sink into her chair. She knew none of the Jedi were blaming or judging her, but she was still mortified. Her home world was like a nightmare she couldn't wake up from. Still, destroying an entire planet was not an action she'd expected from them. The planet wasn't usually so blatant with its aggression. "Do we know the reason for the attack?" she asked loudly, cutting through the whispers like a knife.

"Received a message, we did." Yoda said as Windu took his seat. "Play it now, we shall." The lights instantly dimmed and the holo-projecter activated, revealing an older, regal looking woman. No one noticed how Anakin turned into a statue at the sight. She no longer wondered why the attack had occurred; not with that woman involved.

"I am Ariadne, Queen of Earth," the holo-image stated, the words ringing with a steel confidence. It was a lofty claim, Queen of Earth, but she certainly looked the part. Long hair elegantly coiled on her head, lavish robes adorning her straight and strong body, and an almost visible confidence and arrogance surrounding her. With a contemptuous tilt of her head, the Queen continued, "By now, the Republic world of Gali is nothing more than rubble. This was not a random attack. The Jedi Order has taken something very important from me, and I will destroy the entire Republic to reclaim what was taken, if I must." Her eyes narrowed, showing her anger. "The attacks will continue so long as the Jedi hold the Heir to Earth captive." Then the holo-image cut out, the message ending.

The Chamber was instantly filled with noise, every Jedi trying to figure out what the Queen had meant. None of them could understand, as they had no captives. Only Anakin was still, staring blankly into space. Heir to Earth. Yeah, that was right. She'd almost forgotten.

Tugging at the Force to catch everyone's attention, the blonde stood. "There's something I never told you," she said quietly, knowing they would all hear. "I thought it wouldn't matter anymore. But she's right, in a way." Taking a deep breath, she held her head high. "That's my Grandmother. I am the Heir to Earth."


	3. Tension Rising

**Tension Rising**

"Three years, and you couldn't find a spare moment to tell us you're the Heir to an entire planet?!"

"I left that life behind, Obi-wan! I haven't considered myself Heir to Earth since I was fifteen; three _years_ before I met you! Grandmother is not a forgiving person, so I was sure I'd been disowned."

"You still should have told us. We could have been ready for this!"

"How could you have been ready for an attack _I_ wasn't expecting?! I _left_! I didn't expect all of this to come back and bite me in the ass."

Stopping outside their apartment, Anakin turned to face her angry friend. Obi-wan had been the Jedi equivalent of livid since the blonde's announcement in the Chamber. In a way, she could understand. The scars of her secrets from her time as a spy were no longer painful, but they had not faded. Realizing that she had been keeping still more secrets was probably like a blow to the gut. So yes, she understood.

She did not, however, agree. Again and again and again she had told him why she'd kept this secret. He was the one that would not accept her explanation. Despite being a Jedi for nineteen years, the blonde had a breaking point and she was quickly being shoved closer and closer to it. Still, she stubbornly held on to what little patience she had. This wasn't the first time she and Obi-wan had butt heads and she was sure their relationship would survive in some way. It was T'sul that she was worried about. He had enough issues without Anakin and Obi-wan trying to verbally murder each other.

"I'm not going to explain myself again, Master," the blonde said firmly, twisting the former title in her anger. "You know I left the royal family. You know I didn't tell the Jedi because I did not think it was information that needed to be shared. Accept my reasons or don't, the choice is yours, but this is the way that it is. I cannot change what has happened just to make you feel better." Feeling the anger simmer on both sides of the bond, she decided to give them both a break. "When you make a decision, let me know. After all, you've always been able to find me."

And she walked away, leaving Obi-wan behind. It wasn't a feeling she was used to. In all of the years they had known each other there had only been a small handful of fights that had been this bad. Walking away left a bad taste in her mouth. After the rescue from Earth she had thought these fights would not occur again. Stupid, bloody, optimistic hope.

No one noticed the blonde as she made her way through the Temple. News of the attack was still limited, so there was no reason to stare at the blonde Jedi. It wasn't anything like Earth, where she had been under scrutiny the second she left the safety of her chambers. Here, she was just another Knight and would be ignored so long as she did not behave abnormally.

"Anakin!"

Or not.

"Adam," she greeted shortly as the Twi'lek fell into step with her. She tried to smile but failed miserably, probably telling him more than she wanted about her mental state. Luckily, the young Knight understood and didn't press. There was a reason they'd remained friends for so long. After a few minutes of aimlessly walking, Anakin stopped to glare tiredly at her friend. "I'm not in the mood for company right now, Adam, so if you have something to say, say it." Yes, she was being short even for her, but after the morning she'd had it shouldn't be too much of a surprise. To think, it wasn't even noon yet. Thank the Force Adam knew her well enough to not take offense.

"Senator Amadala is in the main greeting hall, asking to see you," he said, hiding his amusement as the blonde made a face. The relationship between the Jedi and Senator was certainly unique, not least because they were still married. Naboo did not accept divorce and had decided that Anakin was Anakin, regardless of body or gender. So yes, the two females were still married by law and the Order could not touch it. Things weren't as bad as the could be, considering they were good friends, or at least as good of friends as a Jedi and politician could be. Nevertheless, their interactions were usually stilted in person, with both preferring to be long-distance friends. For Amadala to come to the Temple was very strange.

"Thanks for the heads-up," the blonde mumbled to her friend as she turned to leave, but paused when he gently grabbed her shoulder. Surprised, she glanced up to his yellow eyes, silently asking what he thought he was doing.

"It wasn't your fault," he said firmly, dead serious. He'd been in the Chamber and heard her confession. Usually Obi-wan would be the one to support his former padawan, but the Twi'lek had seen the older Jedi's reaction to the news. Anakin wouldn't be getting a lot of help from him for now, leaving the task to Adam.

With how strong the blonde was, most people forgot how fragile and uncertain she was inside. Adam never did, but that was because he was usually the one to find her crying in long forgotten corners of the temple. The destruction of Gali would have been a bigger blow to her than to anyone else in the Order, which meant she needed the most help. "You are the excuse for the attack, not the reason."

"You don't know her," Anakin argued, voice already rough in defeat. "She never would have given the Order or the Republic a passing thought if I was not here and her interest in you will vanish the moment I leave. I know what you're trying to say, but this time you're wrong." She smiled, but it was a cold smile, cruel and full of self-loathing. No amount of time as a Jedi could free her from that. "This time, it _is_ my fault." Pulling out of Adam's grasp, the blonde turned and ran, disappearing around the corner before the Twi'lek could comprehend what she was doing.

By the time Anakin reached the main hall her mask was back in place. Sort of pointless, as Padme could always see through it, but it kept the other Jedi off her back. She'd thought her time of hiding from the Jedi was over, but apparently she was wrong. Dammit.

"Anakin!" The blonde smiled as the raven haired female smiled and waved at her. She allowed the Senator one short hug before pulling back. After so many years, Padme was used to the treatment and took it in stride. "You're looking well. No grey hairs from your padawan yet."

"Not for lack of trying on his part," the Jedi joked back. Attempting to avoid the awkward silence that was bound to come up eventually, she continued, "Adam said you wanted to talk to me. Is something wrong?" The smile on the other woman's face slipped slight, making Anakin's eyebrow arch. That bad then.

"Could we speak privately?" Padme asked, clearly uneasy. The blonde almost wanted to agree, but the rules forbid it. The Senator knew it, too, because she was shaking her head before Anakin could answer. "Of course not, I'm sorry. Non-Jedi aren't allowed further into the Temple and you can't leave. Not after Gali." She meant that no Jedi would be leaving the Temple after a person just accused the Order of committing an act of war, which she would know about because the Senate would have had their own message, but Anakin still winced. Of all the Jedi in the Temple, she was probably the last one the Council would be willing to let step foot outside.

"Senator, why are you babbling?" the blonde asked, trying to keep them on topic. "Surely the problem isn't that bad."

"You never say my name anymore," was the raven's reply, teasing but it came out choppy and rough. They both knew the lack of name usage was to put as much distance as possible between them, so Anakin ignored the statement and gave Padme a slight glare, showing that she wasn't taking the bait. With a sigh, the older woman tucked an errant strand of hair behind her ear before whispering, "I'm pregnant."

Vaguely, the blonde wondered why her blood felt like ice. That wasn't supposed to happen. The roar in her ears was new too. Then everything righted itself and she blinked. "I have a feeling I should not be congratulating you," she said, drawing a watery laugh from her companion. "Does your lover know?"

"I don't have one," Padme said quietly, too serious for Anakin to even wonder if she was joking. "I've slept with one person, Anakin, and it was you."

"That was years ago," the blonde argue, mind racing in an attempt to understand. And yeah, there was some panic mixed in for good measure. This was the absolute last thing she wanted to hear today. Well, almost absolute last. Grandmother arriving at the Temple beat this scenario out for "worst-thing-that-could-happen-right-now" award, but just barely. "It's been nine years; your child can't possibly be mine." Cause that is what the raven was getting at. They both knew it, though neither could quite believe it.

"I know that," Padme said, voice slightly sharp. "I was there after all. But I've done tests; more tests than I originally knew existed! That's why I asked to borrow R2 last week. It did a blood test and midichlorian count of the fetus. Both indicate that you are the father." Despite her firm tone, Anakin could see how afraid she was. The people of Naboo were very strict about marital faithfulness. As two females could not have a child together, Padme would be in a lot of trouble when the pregnancy was discovered. Unless-.

"Send R2 back to me," Anakin said, already making plans, though she was also slamming a mental door on Obi-wan when he inquired about her panic. She did _not_ want to deal with him just then. "I'll look over the tests and results. Maybe I'll see something you missed that can explain what is going on." Padme didn't say anything, but the look on her face and the strength of the hug she pulled Anakin into said it all. Her relief was almost palpable, and the blonde was happy she could help. She'd never loved Padme like the raven had loved the male Anakin, but the Senator was her friend and likely always would be.

Not long after the hug, Padme left to attend a discussion about what the Senate would do about the situation at Gali. Anakin was left alone to wander the halls of the Temple, ignoring Obi-wan's simmering anger and Adam's hovering worry. This had been the first really bad day she'd had in a long time, and she couldn't help but think that it was only going to get worse.

* * *

The Room of a Thousand Fountains was Anakin's favorite room in the Temple. One thousand fountains, each playing a separate and distinct tune. When Obi-wan had first told the blonde about the room, the young spy had thought that the resulting sound would only be able to be described as chaotic. Yet the first time the boy had set foot inside the room, it was almost impossible to get him out. There was chaos in the room, to be certain, but the blonde had always managed to find the peace that was woven through the disorder.

So Adam wasn't overly surprised to find his friend in the Room, perched atop her favorite fountain. What did surprise him was her unkempt appearance. Anakin had always been a bit vain, so to see her so disheveled was very strange. Her hair looked like she'd vaguely finger combed it, he was positive she hadn't changed out of yesterday's clothes, and the bags under her eyes told him how much sleep she was getting. It was moments like this that the Twi'lek knew he needed to be very careful. He could never forget the world that she had come from, and the last thing he wanted was to push her over the edge.

"Adam, either get your ass up here or go away." Hmm, so she was in that kind of mood. Carefully climbing up to join her, Adam wondered what he could say. When talking to a soldier-trained, mentally-unstable Jedi who had been blamed for the destruction of three planets and the annihilation of seven cultures by her Grandmother in the last week, he wasn't sure there was a safe way to talk to her at all. However, the cold war between Anakin and Obi-wan was still going on, so it fell on her friend to help the blonde through her problems. Well, as much as he could.

"Nice view," he complimented as he settled on the edge beside her. "I might have to steal your spot more often." Sighing, she gave him an exasperated look, silently telling him she was not in the mood for banter and to get to the point. There was a hint of red around her eyes like she had been crying. "So you heard about Tython."

"Of course," she snorted, looking down at the Jedi below them. Yet again it fascinated her how nobody ever looked up. There could be an army hanging right above their heads and they would never notice. "The Council informed me as soon as we received word. I'm still trying to figure out how she managed to have the words 'Return my Heir' burned into the planet surface." Wincing, Adam made a note to take the Council to task for that. There was such a thing as being too blunt and open.

"It's not your fault," he told her quietly, but it was clearly the wrong thing to say as she leapt to her feet with a dangerous snarl and started pacing in the shallow bowl. The Force churned around her, still light but with a very distinct and dangerous edge. It was almost like she was surrounded in sheet lightening and only needed a slight push to erupt into a full storm.

"Yes it is!" she managed to yell quietly. "This is all my fault! If I wasn't here, if I wasn't defying her, none of this would be happening. Grandmother was never interested in anything that lay beyond her planet, but she will not give up what she sees as hers." Adam watched in abject horror as his best friend almost seemed to crumble into herself. He had seen Anakin terrified, furious, ecstatic, and devastated. Once he had been trapped on a very small shuttle with the blonde while said friend was sleep-deprived and had just finished consuming seven pots of coffee and three boxes of sugar sticks. But he had never seen her like this. It was like she was destroying herself; fracturing her very being into tiny pieces with no more than her self-hatred.

For a long moment the two friends were still. The Twi'lek was afraid to shatter the blonde and the blonde was afraid of scaring the Twi'lek. Then, "Anakin, what did you choose?"

"I beg your pardon," she stated bluntly, throwing her friend a very strange look. What was he going on about now? However, he just tilted his head and repeated the question. "What are you talking about?"

"A few years ago, I told you that you were what you were because you made the choice to be," he explained patiently. "It is a choice you make every day. When you get up in the morning, you make the choice. When you go to sleep at night, you make the choice. Every time there is a decision to be made, large or small, you make your choice. Do you remember what you chose? What you're choosing, even now?"

Slowly, much slower than either of them wanted, Anakin realized what he was talking about and took a deep breath. With a quiet mental rebuke, she started releasing her negative emotions into the Force. For the last few days she had let her thoughts and emotions fester because that was her nature. That was how she had been raised. How her Grandmother had raised her. But she wasn't Heir to Earth anymore. She was a Jedi because she was choosing to be a Jedi.

It was about time she started acting like it.

"Thanks," she finally sighed, managing a small real smile. The one she got in return was much bigger, but neither minded. A smile was a smile. "I've actually got to go. Master Je'thor'k wants to talk to me about T'sul. I'll see you around?"

"Of course," the Twi'lek laughed, giving Anakin a one-armed hug. "Or I'll hunt you down again. Either way." Startling a snort from the female, Adam thought for the first time that maybe, just maybe, things were going to be okay. So when the blonde waved and jogged away, he decided to track down an older Jedi Master. It was time to kick Obi-wan's butt back into gear.

Traveling through the halls, Anakin spared some time to think about her relationship with her padawan. Considering the silent war being waged between the blonde and her former Master, things had been pretty strained amongst the team. However, though the going was slow, she could confidently say that progress was being made. In fact, as she entered the main hall and spotted her young student with his teacher she was pleased to note that he actually smiled at her. That was a good sign, right?

"Greetings, Anakin," Je'thor'k said as she trotted over to them. "I am glad you could come."

"Not like I have anything else to do," she replied. Normally she would guard her tongue better, but Je'thor'k was a Rikardian. They did not believe in mincing their words and were insulted when others did so. To avoid conflict, Je'thor'k encouraged all Jedi to speak their mind with him. As Anakin's thoughts were usually sarcastic or borderline rude, this led to some interesting conversations between the two. Still, there was no Jedi that she was more honest with and there were few Jedi he respected more. "You said in the message that you had something to tell me." Grinning down at her apprentice, she continued, "Something about how amazingly awesome my padawan is at healing?" The Twi'lek blushed at the praise, though it was hard to see with his skin tone, but couldn't hide his grin.

"T'sul _is_ doing exceptionally well," the older Master agreed, which was high praise from the reserved Jedi. "With some more in-depth study he could become one of the best Healers we have. That is why I was wondering if you would be willing to transfer him to an actual Healer." Master and padawan both stiffened in shock. Transfers, the process of a padawan switching training Masters, weren't common but they did happen, usually in cases like this as Anakin was a combat Jedi and couldn't give T'sul what he would need to be a Healer. The blonde had almost been transferred a few times herself, though she and Obi-wan had managed to work out their problems together. It was true that T'sul would learn more from an actual Healer but-.

"With all due respect, Master Je'thor'k, no," she said firmly, surprising both Jedi, though T'sul's instant relief that washed through her from the training bond told her she'd made the right choice. "I chose T'sul at first, but he has chosen me as well. If he wishes to transfer, I won't stand in the way, but I will not initiate the process."

For a moment, the elder Jedi stared, but then a smile crossed his face. "Well spoken, young Skywalker." And no, she was not scowling at the 'young' term. "If either of you change your minds, let me know."

"We will," the blonde promised with a smile of her own. "May the Force be with you."

"May the Force be with you," Je'thor'k replied, bowing slightly before walking away. A moment later, Anakin found herself on the receiving end of an exuberant hug. Laughing for the first time in a week, she returned the embrace. The happiness and relief flowing from the bond wiped away any doubt she might have had. This was the right choice for them.

"Thank you, Master," T'sul said quietly, filling Anakin with a gentle joy. Her relationship with Obi-wan had never been like this. As much as she wouldn't trade that connection, she still cherished what she had now.

"Anytime," she whispered back before pulling away. "Come on, let's go find Caelum. Maybe he knows a Healer who would be willing to give you some special training." Giving an enthusiastic nod, T'sul fell into step beside the blonde, almost skipping along. It was so adorable, his Master found she didn't have to concentrate to remember to smile.

The second they stepped into the Entrance Hall though, Anakin froze, every instinct screaming. The Force was shrieking all around her and she whipped her head back and forth, trying to figure out why. No other Jedi was reacting but she knew what it was. If there was one thing she hadn't expected from her Grandmother, it was a direct attack on the Temple. "Master?" T'sul asked, catching the blonde's attention but when she turned to look at him she spotted the ship flying right for them.

"Get down!" she screamed, using the Force to push as many Jedi out of the area as she could while grabbing T'sul and spinning around so that she was between him and the danger. Suddenly everything was heat and pain and roars and screams, the Force straining all around as Anakin tried her hardest to protect everyone she could.

Then nothing.

* * *

"Master? Wake-up, please!" Slowly, Anakin opened her eyes to see T'sul's panicked face. "Master! Are you alright?"

"I wouldn't say that," she groaned, feeling the rubble pressing against her back. "I'll survive though. How about you?" There were no visible injuries, but she still worried.

"I am unharmed," the Twi'lek answered, shaking slightly. "You shielded me." In a rare show of vulnerability, he curled closer to his Master, clearly afraid. The blonde didn't hesitate to gather him in her arms, sending him calm waves through their bond. She could already feel the Jedi trying to rescue them, Adam and Obi-wan at the forefront. They would reach the trapped pair in minutes, allowing T'sul to be free. Anakin, however, had to figure out how to tell everyone that she couldn't feel her legs.


	4. Story Time

**Story Time**

"This is a waste of time," Obi-wan said quietly, keeping a wary eye on the other party. "They aren't interested in peace." He knew the Jedi with him agreed. Earth had consented to attend a series of peace-talks with the Order, but it had quickly become obvious that they were simply humoring the Jedi. There was no inclination towards peace, so long as Anakin remained with the Order.

"I could have told you that," the blonde in question sighed, carefully shifting her weight. "Grandmother doesn't put this much effort into a cause just to pull out. She's in this till the end." The older Jedi nodded, even as he worriedly glanced at his former padawan. Perhaps the only good thing to come from the attack was the end of silent hostilities between them. The elder was ashamed that it taken nearly losing her to make him realize how stupid he had been. Their relationship was in no way where it had once been, as their trust had been badly damaged, but they were starting to rebuild. However, the budding hope had taken another hit recently. He'd argued with the blonde for days about attending the peace-talks, but had finally caved and gave his permission when he realized how desperate she was. Anakin _needed_ to confront her former planet. It was the only way she could move on with her life.

That being said, none of the Jedi were particularly happy about the blonde's presence for the plain and simple reason that she was still forced to use the leg braces. When she'd been pulled from the rubble of the Temple, everyone had feared that her spinal cord had been damaged beyond repair. She'd had no feeling or movement below her waist, leaving her crippled. It was sheer stubbornness and determination that led to Anakin walking again. She'd undergone several medical procedures, monitored closely by Caelum and Master Bant, eventually gaining back feeling in her legs two weeks after the attack. However, it was only in the last few days that she'd been walking with the braces. It was still hard for her to move and she couldn't stand or walk for long, but no one doubted that she would eventually fully recover. She wouldn't accept anything else.

However, being at the peace-talks was setting her back. Not physically so much, though she was exhausting herself by pretending that she was fine, but emotionally she was a wreck. She needed to confront Earth, yet she wasn't ready for it.

"Skywalker," Master Windu said, drawing closer to the small cluster of Jedi. He would never be the blonde's biggest fan, but even he admitted that she was a good Jedi. Her insights and understanding of Earth had already saved them several times during the negotiations. "What do you know of the people in black masks?"

"VanGuards," she answered easily, even as she refused to look at the people in question. "The Queen's personal guards, though she does loan them out on occasion. Stay away from them." Obi-wan gave her a glance and a nudge through their bond, silently saying that she needed to explain. Sighing, the blonde carefully sat down on a nearby ledge, trying to take the pressure off her legs and taking care that her robe continued to cover the braces. Without a word, the other Jedi closed ranks around her, creating a buffer between the blonde and anyone who might want to take advantage of her weakness. "The VanGuard; seventy-five young men, sworn to serve the Queen in all things. They live and die on her orders. Every one is highly trained, possibly by Sith though I have no proof of that. I just know they are much better trained than anyone else on Earth. From the moment they give their oath to the Queen, they wear the mask. It never comes off. They also don't speak."

"Why?" Adam asked, subtly shifting closer to his friend. He didn't like how some of the Earth humans were eyeing her.

"To protect the Queen's secrets, I guess," she replied with a shrug, trying to hide how much the conversation bothered her. She didn't want to tell them that she feared the VanGuards more than anything in the universe. "Some say that part of their oath is a vow of silence. Others, that they cut out their own tongues as a sign of loyalty." That made every Jedi turn an interesting shade of green.

"Which theory is real?" Obi-wan asked. When no answer was forthcoming, he glanced away from the Earth delegates and focused on his former apprentice. She was looking away, biting her lip slightly. Finally, she mumbled a response.

"My Grandmother has this thing for blood and pain." An uneasy silence fell of the group as her words sunk in. The more they leaned about the Queen and how things were on Earth, the more they marveled at how Anakin had turned out. The fact that she could adhere to the Jedi Code so well was quickly changing from impressive to miraculous.

"Master Jedi," a voice suddenly said, catching their attention. It was one of the Earth ambassadors An older female, her grey hair was almost silver and sensibly styled. Unlike the other delegates, she wore plain clothing, though each piece was clearly well-made. Both shirt and leggings were form fitting and pitch black, disguising the material they were made of. Other than two rings, she was unadorned by jewelry and appeared somewhat plain.

Except for her eyes. They were blue, sharp and cold as ice. Despite the age wrinkles that lined her face, the eyes were young. And dangerous. "I know the talks will not resume until tomorrow, but I wanted to discuss a few points with you now," she said easily. The Jedi frowned slightly, though only another Jedi would notice. To discuss anything outside of the official talks was forbidden. The people from Earth knew this. Something about their reaction must have shown their displeasure, because the ambassador quickly smiled, going for a reassuring look. "Nothing major, I promise. Simply that, like you, I want the war to end."

"That's rich," the blonde Jedi suddenly scoffed, startling everyone. Those cruel eyes flicked to the injured Jedi and narrowed. Obviously they knew each other. "Please, do us a favor and don't lie to our faces."

"I'm sure I don't understand," the ambassador started but cut herself off when Anakin surged to her feet. The room was instantly transformed as a standoff occurred between every Jedi and VanGuard. Everything became deathly silent as every living being focused on the confrontation.

"Don't lie to me, Grandmother," Anakin said quietly, nearly spitting the last word. "You're the one that started this war and you're the one continuing it. If you wanted this conflict to end, you could do so with one word. So forgive me if I don't believe you."

"Oh Aria, you wound me," the woman, the _Queen_ , chided, clearly not taking the blonde seriously. "I speak the truth; I want this war to end. But I also want what's mine."

"I am not a possession!" the younger shot back, holding her ground. The Jedi around her knew she was still in control of her anger, but each could feel how close to the edge she was. It wouldn't take much to push her over. Slowly, Obi-wan sent her a mental anchor to keep her stable. After a moment, she accepted it. "You also seem to forget that I know you. You're the Bloody Queen; war and death are your endorphin fix."

"Bloody Queen?" Adam muttered. His voice was quiet but everyone heard him clearly in the vacuum to followed the blonde's words. Anakin shifted slightly toward him, indicating she'd heard, but her eyes remained fixed on the woman before her. After a moment, she reluctantly explained.

"My family had ruled Earth for over 250 years when my Grandmother, the Bloody Queen, was born. She was the youngest of seventeen children, and her father was king, ensuring she would never rule. The throne is not passed down from parent to child, but from grandparent to grandchild. It has always been that way and every royal child knows it. But the Bloody Queen wanted to rule. It was her all consuming dream. One could even use the terms obsessed or insane and remain accurate.

"Therein lay the danger. The Bloody Queen was quietly insane. No one in the moment could see the signs. So when her 18th birthday rolled around, there did not appear to be anything wrong. Her parents asked what she wanted for her birthday and she replied, 'My only desire is to celebrate the day with the entire family.' A simple request and her parents assured it would happen. On the day of the party, the castle was filled with ever person who shared blood with the Bloody Queen. Everyone that stood between her and the throne.

"As the day went by, everything seemed to go well. None of the family suspected that anything was wrong. At the dinner, in accordance to tradition, the Bloody Queen gave a toast. Some drivel about how overjoyed she was that they could all attend."

"You wound me, Aria," the Queen interrupted mildly, not appearing to be affected by the account. "That toast came from my heart." The blonde snorted in disbelief, scrambling to keep a grip on her temper. A gleam had appeared in both sets of blue eyes, finally revealing how similar the two females were. No one could doubt that they were related.

"The words don't matter," Anakin bit out, "though it doesn't surprise me that that's the one detail you object to. The point of the toast was that every family member, from the oldest uncle to the youngest niece, had to take a sip of wine. Minutes later, every one of them was asleep." The Jedi stiffened, suddenly knowing where the story was going. A sharp warning flashed through the Queen's gaze but was deftly ignored by the blonde. "The wine was drugged. Before the party the Bloody Queen had ordered the slaves to lace the vats with powerful sedatives. Once every family member had succumbed to the drugs, the Bloody Queen took a sword and killed them all herself. Every. Last. One.

"Her coronation was the next day. No one knew she'd murdered her family. She said that the slaves had revolted and killed everyone. The slaves did not refute her because she'd had them all put to death for treason." Anakin suddenly paused, a strange and cautiously curious look on her face. "I've always wondered," she said quietly. "Did you ever regret it? Over two-hundred dead in one night, and all by your hand or on your orders. Did you ever wish you'd made a different choice?"

"Why would I regret it?" the elder asked, voice flat. "I got the throne, just as I had always wanted. It is foolish to regret a success. Remember, Aria, the end always justifies the means."

Instead of getting upset, the blonde sighed in resignation. She wasn't exactly surprised by the answer. Returning to the story, she finished, "Of all the generations of my family, hers _is_ the most violent, even before she attacked the Republic. She ruthlessly suppresses anyone who opposes her, wiping out entire villages at times. Over the course of her life she had nine children. However, once her eldest had children of his own, she killed the rest of them. Her intent was to keep the line narrow and not spread out amongst other families. The grandchildren were twins, a boy and a girl, but while both grew up hard and cruel, one had a viscous streak the other couldn't match. That was the child the Bloody Queen chose as her Heir."

"And you were such a promising Heir," the Queen cut in, having the gall to look disappointed. "I wonder what happened." A terrible fiery rage flooded through the blonde, making every Jedi wince, but she didn't show it. Before her Grandmother, she was a master at concealing her emotions. Only Obi-wan could feel everything, and he kept quiet.

"Elesia happened," was Anakin's near silent answer. There wasn't even a flicker of recognition. At first the Jedi thought the Queen was just good at masks, but then she snorted. "You don't even remember her, do you." Despite the wording, it wasn't a question, and she didn't wait for an answer. "I'm not returning to Earth, Grandmother. Regardless of my past, I am a Jedi now. I have no inclination to give up the life I chose for the life I escaped. Save your arguments and your blackmail and get out." For a moment it was a toss-up if the elder would attack, but then the Queen leaned back and gave a sharp smile. With a small nod she walked away, the VanGuard following. The Earth ambassadors hurried after her, clearly knowing that peace would not occur this time. Then again, it had never been a possibility.

"I'm sorry, Masters," Anakin said quietly, resolutely refusing to acknowledge her shaking legs. "I overstepped my authority."

"You did not," Master Windu disagreed. "You knew her and the situation best, and handled it like a Jedi should." Then, because he was Windu, he added, "Just don't make a habit of it."

"Of course, Master," she chuckled, finally allowing Obi-wan to support her. Master Bant was going to kill her when she heard about how much the blonde had been walking and standing. Finally swallowing her pride, Anakin met her former Master's eyes and asked, "Can we go home now?"

"As soon as we get permission from the Republic representatives, I promise," he answered, letting her feel how proud he was of her. "Until then, you can rest in the shuttle while Adam preps it for flight." Nodding, the blonde allowed him to pass her off to her friend and stumbled away, trusting the Twi'lek to not let her hit a wall while her mind wrestled with a problem.

Her Grandmother had been there to kill. The Jedi might have thought her outfit to be plain or reserved, but Anakin knew better. She'd been sitting at the Queen's feet when the master armorer had presented the ensemble. A special material that looked like cloth but was stronger than any known Earth metal, the blonde wasn't sure if even lightsabers could cut it. Several hidden pockets, perfect for hiding small and deadly weapons. The two rings, one filled with poison and the other able to generate an energy shield. It was a deadly creation, made all the more insidious by its innocent appearance. The Queen had praised the armorer for his genius and ingenuity, then had Aria kill him right there so that no one else would know the secrets of the armor.

Do not trust others to kill your enemies. That was the first lesson Anakin had ever learned from her Grandmother. For the Queen to come all the way to the peace-talks in that armor, she'd wanted someone dead. That was the only reason the blonde had found the courage to confront her at all. She'd _never_ openly confronted her Grandmother. To do so was to court death, and while the Jedi no longer feared dying, she was strangely fond of living.

"Your Grandmother is a scary person," Adam finally said, letting Anakin sit in the co-pilot seat. She was still too weak to fly the shuttle herself, but there was no better pilot in the Order. With her looking on, the Twi'lek was confidant that anything he missed would be pointed out. "I'm glad you didn't turn out like her."

Villages burnt to ashes while the people were trapped inside, screaming. Thousands starved to feed a party of thirty. Entire families exterminated because of one person's disrespect. A child of twelve years killed for a sneeze.

"I am too, Adam. I am too."


	5. Final Straw

**Final Straw**

"Is this a bad time to make a snow angel joke?" Adam asked as Anakin stomped into the tent. He laughed at her glare but held up his hands surrender. "Sorry, sorry, but I couldn't resist."

"You're lucky I like you," the blonde muttered, slowly peeling off her extra layers. Despite her love of snow, these constant blizzards were insane. Being from the warm and dry Earth, she was not accustomed to these extremes. "Remind me to blacklist Hoth on my 'potential vacation places' list. I am never coming to this Force-forsaken lump of ice, rock, and misery again."

"Aw, but its so nice here," the Twi'lek teased, tossing his friend a dry and warm robe. By the time she'd put it on he had a mug of hot tea ready for her. She accepted with a grateful sigh, ignoring the fact that she abhorred tea. On Hoth, heat was heat.

"Why are we even on this bloody planet?" she asked plaintively, allowing the heat from the mug to seep into her fingers. "We're in the middle of no where. There's nothing on this planet but ice and animals that I still can't figure out how they live." Shaking her head, she looked back out at the raging blizzard. "Of all the planets to choose from, why did Grandmother attack this one?"

"I'm not sure," Adam shrugged. "Maybe she doesn't like the cold?" The blonde gave him a disgusted look, making him smile. "Oh right, sorry, that's you."

"You're evil," she grumbled, taking a sip of the scalding liquid. Ignoring his pout, she passed by to enter the base proper, instantly having to dodge a speeding cart and ignoring the droid driver's insulting whistle. Like the training grounds from her soldier days, the base was constantly busy, demanding that she move in order to survive. There was a moment where she could have greeted Cody, but he was heading out himself so they had to settle for exchanging hurried hellos.

Even the command center at the middle of the base was bustling with activity. The Jedi in the area greeted the blonde warmly, politely disregarding her frazzled appearance. Obi-wan alone watched her closely, not liking the tremor in her hands. He wasn't happy about her being on the front lines. Like with the peace-talks, she had stubbornly pushed on when she wasn't ready. Several times he'd been forced to watch her struggle through panic attacks and extreme bouts of guilt. The warning signs were there for another meltdown, but she was holding herself together. Barely.

For her part, Anakin was aware of how fragile her control was. Trying to act normal, she was darkly amused to realize that most of her control came from her early life training in the palace. Seemed her life was filled with cruel ironies. She knew Obi-wan was watching her, aware of how close she was to breaking despite the bond she'd tried to stifle. When she realized the idea of his concern was annoying her, she knew she needed to leave.

Back when the base had first been built, a special room had been set aside for Jedi use. Insulated and soundproof, it was their mediation room. That's where Anakin went, not caring when Adam and Obi-wan followed silently. Instead, she chose a mat in the corner so she could have her back to the wall and settled down, closing her eyes and trying to release her emotions. The males waited patiently on their own mats, understanding that she needed time.

"I ran away from home when I was fifteen," she said suddenly, eyes still shut. "All my life, I had only really loved two people. My guard, Jordan, and my personal slave, Elesia. One day my parents decided that my brother and I needed to go on vacation. Jordan came with me, but Elesia was sick so I left her behind. When I returned, I couldn't find her and no one knew where she was. It took days to learn that she had been assigned to the throne room for the duration of my absence. Being sick, she'd sneezed and Grandmother had had her executed. I don't think she even knew who had made the noise. I know she didn't care. So I ran. Joined the military and tried to forget that I was royal. Jordan followed me into the army, but we were separated quickly. He wasn't part of the avatar program, but I saw him once when Caelum and I were on the run. He knew we were wanted, but he let us go."

Her voice trailed off, fading into silence. For a moment it seemed like she wasn't going to continue. Until she whispered, "I killed him today."

Words of condolence were on Obi-wan's lips, but he swallowed them. There was nothing he could say to help his friend. Besides, Anakin being Anakin, she probably wouldn't accept comfort anyway. For a Jedi, she had an abnormal connection to her guilt. But then she was looking at him, eyes begging for answers. He hadn't seen her look like this since the Council had rejected her way back in the beginning. She was conflicted and lost, unsure of what she was supposed to do next.

"I'm sorry you're hurting," he said, getting up and moving to sit beside her. "The loss of life is never acceptable, and you should not have been put in this position. You did what was needed, but its okay to feel regret so long as it does not consume you. No one will look down on you for this. Just remember, there is no death."

"There is the Force," she finished, a tiny grin tucked into the corners of her mouth.

"Exactly," the elder Jedi smiled. "I've no doubt Jordan is already watching out for you from the Force. Surely such an amazing friend would not hold a grudge against you."

"He'd probably smack me over the head for being stupid," she chuckled, yelping when Adam did just that. "Hey!"

"I smack you on his behalf," the Twi'lek teased, sitting on her other side. Like Obi-wan, he knew words of comfort would be rejected but after years of friendship, the two had their own ways to give and receive support. "Now that we all agree that you're being stupid, can I make that snow angel joke?" Laughing, the blonde pushed him over, finally giving a true smile. Her former Master could feel that she was still raw, but she was calmer and more stable now. The threat of an epic meltdown was now low enough that he felt safe changing the subject.

"How's Padme doing?" he asked, chuckling as the younger Jedi groaned and fell onto her back in a splayed position.

"Pregnant," the blonde sighed, staring at the ceiling. "She feels like a bloated bantha, she waddles, she always has to go pee, she has the worst morning sickness and the strangest cravings, and I know because she calls to rant at me every chance she gets. Sometimes I feel like she's blaming me for all of this."

"Did we ever figure out how she got pregnant in the first place?" Adam inquired curiously. "I mean, Anakin is sort of missing some vital pieces of anatomy for this one." He laughed and ducked when the blonde took a swipe at him. "What, it's true?"

"You didn't have to phrase it like that," the embarrassed female grumbled. "And yes, we figured it out. Remember how Padme was kidnapped a little over a month before Gali?" Both of the males nodded, clearly recalling how the blonde had nearly driven herself into the ground to save the Senator. "Well, she always said after that she'd been sedated the whole time but when we rescued her and she woke up she felt uncomfortable, like she'd had a surgery. It took some time, but R2 was able to trace the communications the kidnappers had sent and learned they were working for my Grandmother." Scowling, Anakin reminded herself yet again that she could not go off and kill the meddlesome old lady. Jedi didn't do stuff like that. "During my time as a boy, several samples were taken and carefully stored/preserved. Sperm samples among them."

"So the kidnappers used those samples to impregnate Padme," Obi-wan summed up, frowning in contemplation. "But the question of why remains. Your Grandmother does not strike me as someone who would do anything without a well thought out reason. She wants you back, so why did she give you a greater reason to stay?"

"Because she doesn't understand the Jedi," the blonde answered easily with a shrug, laying back down. "From the communications R2 was able to salvage, I think she was planning to use the child against me. You know, threaten to kill it if I didn't come back or something similar. She didn't understand that Jedi don't allow themselves attachments like that. You have to remember, on Earth everything revolves around amassing power and passing it through the family. Therefore, everyone wants two things. Power, and strong children to carry our legacy. That's why she's coming after me like she is. I have several brothers and sisters that could easily take my place as Heir, but she has decided that I am the strongest so, in her eyes, I'm the only one that can stand in her place. The idea that I was actually capable of placing others before my child never entered her mind."

"You'd think she'd realize her mistake," Adam grumbled in frustration, casually leaning against the cool metal walls.

"Actually, it's good that she hasn't," Anakin sighed. "Grandmother is the kind of person that believes absolutely in first impressions. She doesn't think people can change very much, so she'll continue to treat me as though I am still Aria."

"How is that a good thing?" the Twi'lek wondered, looking utterly confused. Obi-wan just smiled and shook his head slightly, knowing full well what his former apprentice meant.

"It's good because I know how she reacts to Aria," the female explained. "I know what to do and say at any given moment to steer the confrontation my way. Remember the peace-talks? She was using techniques that would have made me fly into a rage before, but I was able to keep calm...ish. That's not something she knows how to deal with, which gives me an advantage, and I'll take anything I can get against her."

The trio fell into a comfortable silence, feeling more relaxed than they had in a long time. With the war against Earth dragging on, it was nice to have friends close by. However, Anakin couldn't help but feel that they were in the calm before the storm. A strange itch in the back of her mind was telling her in no uncertain terms that everything was about to change in a very explosive and dangerous way. Normally she would rely in the current, but everything on Hoth was cold so that was no help. She just had to sit and wait. Two things she hated.

"How is T'sul?" Adam suddenly asked, looking down at his friend. "Still upset about being left on Coruscant?"

"Yes, though he would die before admitting it," the blonde sighed. Inwardly, she still winced at the memory. She knew it was a bad idea to take her battle skittish padawan to the front lines, so she had elected to leave him at the Temple to learn Healing. What she hadn't expected was his panic that she was abandoning him, though in hindsight she should have known that was exactly what would happen. It had taken hours to convince him that she was still his Master and that her decision had been made with his best intention in mind. Understanding did not bring acceptance, but he had finally let her go so she could board her ship and leave. Since then she had received several comm calls that were silently asking for assurance that she was coming back home.

Opening her mouth to expound on her answer, Anakin's eyes suddenly shot wide as the Force screamed. Using every ounce of power she had, she Force-pushed her friends across the room violently, seconds before the wall they were sitting next to exploded inward by the strength of the outside blast. For one horrifying second everything was heat and pain, and then the fire ball fizzled out and the blonde had leapt to her feet. She could now hear the screaming as more bombs detonated and Earth forces began swarming their defenses. Behind her, the blonde could hear Obi-wan and Adam getting up so, trusting them to follow, she raced from the room, lightsaber ablaze.

On Earth, Aria had been considered a competent sword fighter. She could hold her own against many fighters that were older, stronger, and more experienced. However, it was amongst the Jedi that she became a true master of the craft. Most of her opponents barely had time to realize that she was attacking at all before they were killed. On every battlefield, everyone knew where she was because of the trail of bodies she left behind her.

Hoth was no exception. With every soldier sense and skill at the forefront of her mind, Anakin cut a deadly swath through the enemy. She stopped only twice, each time to deal with soldiers bearing red lightsabers. If they were Sith or not, she did not know, for other than the weapon there was hardly anything dangerous about them. With black humor, she thought that if M'ren had still been alive he would have killed the men himself for being so weak. As it was, they took barely any extra effort to kill.

It wasn't until she was hit with a face-full of snow and wind that Anakin realized that she had fought her way completely through the base. Turning back around to face the carnage, she realized that her victory was quickly turning out to be the only one. Everywhere she looked, the Republic forces were in retreat. She could hear the guns going off outside, clearing the land and air for the ships to evacuate. Spotting Obi-wan, she quickly signaled for him to go, which he swiftly obeyed, covering the departure of several soldiers. Desperately, the blonde searched the seething mass for Adam, casually taking out any soldier stupid enough to attack her. Finally spotting the mass of green skin, she opened her mouth to yell but it was a scream that came as she watched a soldier stab him in the back.

Losing control for a short moment, Anakin used the Force to hurl everyone around her out of the way, enemy and friendly alike. With panic in her every move she ran to her fallen friend, nearly collapsing beside him. He was already pale, blood pouring from the hole in his chest. Desperate, the blonde tried to cover the wound, knowing it was pointless even as her hands were soon covered in blood. She wasn't aware that she was screaming for a Healer, tears falling unheeded from her face.

However, she did notice the gentle touch of a hand on her cheek. Startled, she looked up sharply to meet her friend's gaze. Though his eyes were clouded in pain, the Twi'lek managed a smile. "Don't...cry," he gasped shortly, clearly struggling. "You're not...a...pretty crier." That drew a watery laugh, though the tears only increased.

"I'm gonna get you out of here," she told him, frantically holding on to his hand. "I promise, we're gonna get out." He was already shaking his head, barely able to keep eye contact. "Adam, I swear, I will. I'll get us-"

"No," he said quietly. "You will...I won't." Sobbing, the blonde could only clinch her eyes shut and shake her head violently. "It's okay...Ani." Another violent shake. She wasn't even aware of the Earth soldier that tried to approach while she was weak, nor when he died as the Force lashed out against him. Force that was much Darker than anything she had used before. "Ani...look at me." Another shake. "Please." Crying, she finally opened her eyes and looked at him again. Through the blur of tears, she saw him smile one last time. "Remember what you chose. I...I love..."

He never finished. The light faded from his eyes as his final breath escaped his body with a soft sigh. Through the Force, Anakin could feel everything disappear. There was nothing left of her friend, except a broken body.

She was numb. There was no feeling at all. Not as she leaned down and kissed his forehead. Not as she lay him gently on the floor. Not as she slowly got to her feet, slumped in a way to indicate weakness. She didn't seem to hear the Republic soldiers yelling for her to run. She didn't seem to see the Earth forces closing in. She didn't seem to be aware of anything at all. But then her gaze snapped up, locking on to the soldier who had stabbed Adam. In that moment, every person that saw her eyes knew that if she was numb, it was not with sadness. It was with rage.

Her eyes were gold.

With a snap and a hiss, the blonde triggered her lightsaber. Instantly, countless weapons were leveled at her, ready to kill if she so much as twitched. But she didn't. She stood perfectly still, staring at them all. Not being Force-sensitive, they could not feel the storm that was brewing around her, nor the Darkness that was descending in mass. The Jedi could, but only Obi-wan recognized that the source wasn't a Sith. Eyes wide in dread, he spun back around with a yell, but he was too late. With a roar never heard by a living creature before, Anakin lashed out with everything she had. The soldiers closest to her left no traces, being vaporized fully by her rage and the power of the Force. Others further back left bloody stains to mark where they had been, but little else.

Racing back towards the base, Obi-wan could hear the screams of the Earth forces as they were slaughtered, as well as the roars that he couldn't believe were coming from his friend. He also felt her rage and agony surging through their bond, driving him to his knees several times. An extremely powerful burst of pain had him collapsing, holding his head as he screamed out himself. Then hands were grabbing him, hauling him to his feet. Through bleary eyes he could make out Cody, and as the clone tried to guide him away he resisted. "No!" he gasped, turning back to the base again. "Anakin. Anakin needs us!" Understanding, the soldier didn't say anything, instead supporting the Jedi as they hurried towards the battle.

When a cry of terror came from behind, both men looked up and froze in horror. There, towering above the burning base, was the image of a great dragon. When it unfurled its wings every being could hear the snap. Then it threw it's head back, roaring in triumph to the sky while the blizzard raged around it. "What is that?" Cody asked, barely able to contain his fear. This was _not_ something the Kaminoans had trained him for.

"It's the Force," Obi-wan whispered, dread and fear filling him as the full situation hit. "It's the Dark Side of the Force." With a sharp movement, the dragon looked down, catching the men squarely in its gaze. It snarled threateningly, but then froze before getting shredded away by the wind. Only when the last traces were gone did the pair hurry on.

Inside the base's remains, they found the massacre. Not a single Earth soldier still lived and most were so deformed they could no longer be identified. In the center of it all was Anakin, sitting hunched over next to Adam's body. Hearing footsteps, the blonde looked up sharply, but upon recognizing them, she let her mask fall. The look of terror, hatred, and shock was etched on her face. Looking right into her former Master's eyes, she whispered, "What have I done?" Speaking shattered her control and she broke down sobbing, not responding at all when the older Jedi pulled her into a hug. She just wept as her soul roared and screamed in agony, next to the body of the friend she would never be able to save.


	6. If you can't beat them

**If you can't beat them...**

The Temple was quiet and still. Most of the Jedi were sleeping in various degrees of peacefulness. Outside the walls, Coruscant was celebrating the first Republic victory of the war, but the Order was subdued. Even those that didn't know the details were aware that the win had come at a cost they could not afford. Namely, the fall of a Jedi as powerful and important as Anakin Skywalker.

For her part, Anakin didn't care. She had seen the looks of fear and pity on the faces of the Jedi on Hoth. The Temple had been no better, and she had sealed herself in her room. Despite meditating for hours at a time, she couldn't free herself from the Dark stain that clung to her mind. The mere thought of Adam was still enough to send her spiraling down a path she couldn't afford to take. Other Jedi had tried to help her, but she'd violently rejected them all. Instead she chose to sit in the dark, mentally wrestling with herself and her issues, stubbornly refusing to admit that she was unable to change anything where she was.

Then, with the cold clarity that she knew she should have feared, Anakin knew what she wanted to do. She wanted to kill her Grandmother. Lashing out against the soldiers had been immediate and the grief of killing a little less than three-thousand men had nearly consumed her, but the flame of revenge was not so easily extinguished. Now it burned bright in her heart, baying for the blood of the person that had done all this. It was no longer enough to complain or reassure herself that things were different. From the time she had been born, Anakin's life had been dictated by her Grandmother. Every time she tried to break out, she was forced back into compliance. But this time it hadn't been the blonde that had paid the price. It had been billions of innocent people. It had been Adam.

The Bloody Queen had to die.

With that decision made, the blonde began to plan. She quietly gathered supplies, working at night while the majority of the Order slept. The day was spent locked away, going over plans, sleeping, and meditating. It wasn't until nearly falling down a very long flight of stairs that she realized it had been several days since she had eaten. This prompted her to stop and think of how she was treating her body. The last time she'd allowed herself to fall so far physically had been after her escape from the palace at fifteen. Back then she hadn't cared if she lived or died, only wanting to get as far from her Grandmother as she could. Jordan had pulled her back and forced her to take care of herself, but she didn't have anyone to do that at the Temple. The only one that had ever been willing to get in her face about stuff like this was Ad-

Cutting the thought off violently, the blonde ran through the halls. She made a short stop at the kitchens, moving quickly to avoid being seen as she grabbed some food and hurried back out. Her pack hung heavy on her back, annoying in its weight. She'd have to start exercising again to rebuild the muscle she'd let waste away. The need wasn't immediate though, and she let it fade away quickly. Everything was in place, encouraging her to pick up her pace. Her heart clenched slightly as she thought about how her padawan and former master would react. She'd left them holo-messages, but was under no delusion that they wouldn't be hurt by her departure, especially because she had not told them or said goodbye in person.

It wasn't like she was entirely happy with what she was doing. The blonde had spent days trying to come up with a different plan, but nothing had worked. Her Grandmother had to be stopped and she was the only Jedi capable of completing the objective. That was why she was racing through the empty Temple halls, careful to avoid the few Jedi that were still awake and wandering about. Somewhere in the distance she could sense Windu moving about the Temple, forcing her to change course. No one could see her, because if they did they would try to stop her. That was unacceptable.

The only time she slowed her mad dash was when she reached the Room of a Thousand Fountains. For the very first time, she couldn't feel the calm and peace that the room usually gave her. Everything was just a jumble of sound, each melody hiding within others. Despite her best attempts to find the quiet that she always reached in the Room, this time it eluded her.

With a quiet cry, the blonde allowed herself to fall onto the rim of her favorite fountain, throwing her pack to the ground. Burying her face in her hands, she stubbornly held back her tears, despite the burning. "What am I doing?" she gasped, anger lashing at her. Adam's face tried to form in her mind, but she violently shoved it away. She felt like a sword was lodged in her chest, tearing her open from the inside and she couldn't stop it. Her heart had never hurt so much. Losing Elesia had caused pain, but there had always been a wall between her and the older girl. No matter how close they had been, Elesia had been her slave, her property. Part of her pain had been because she'd lost a prized possession. Adam hadn't been like that at all. He was her equal in every way; a friend that liked her for her. Losing him...it destroyed something deep inside she hadn't even known she'd had.

"What should I do?" she sobbed, pressing the heels of her palms into her eyes in an attempt to stem the flood of tears. "Dammit all, what should I do?!"

"Stop yelling, for starters." Startled, the blonde's head shot up, eyes wide as her hands instantly reached for the lightsaber hanging at her hip. She checked her movements slightly when she realized the man before her was dressed as a Master. Not one she recognized, true, but that was understandable. Memorization had never really been her strong point. Besides, what was to notice? An older male human with brown hair and eyes. He had a goatee type beard and strange marks on his face, but nothing that would stand out. It was the Force that surrounded him that caught her attention. It was Light, as all Jedi, but it wasn't the calm movement that was usually present. In fact, it almost felt like a mix of Light and Dark.

"I'm sorry Master," she instantly demurred, ducking her head again in the hopes that he hadn't recognized her. "I thought I was alone."

"Obviously," he drawled, a smile tucked into the corners of his mouth and shining from his eyes. With a subtle gesture he asked permission to sit beside her and the blonde hastily nodded. As he settled on the rim he sighed happily, closing his eyes to better focus on the tunes that jumbled around them. For long moments the pair were silent, but then he looked down at her. "You are troubled, young one. And before you ask, no, I did not get that from the screaming." Anakin blushed as she closed her mouth, having been about to sarcastically ask him that. "I felt the turmoil as soon as you entered the Room." Chuckling, he held his hand out and caught a single drop from the fountain. "They've never played such discord before."

"I don't understand," the blonde admitted with a frown, still careful to keep her face turned away. "The fountains always play like this...don't they?"

"Some certainly think so," the Master agreed easily with a gentle smile. "However, the Jedi have forgotten why the Room was made. You see, young one, the fountains reflect the Jedi inside the room. When you are lost or chaotic, the water plays it back. It is only when you begin to work through your own tangles that the music comes out."

Without thinking, Anakin turned to face the old human, shock in every line of her face. "How can that be?" she asked. "When I came here as a spy everything sounded so clear. I heard everything perfectly; the harmony that eluded most others."

"Indeed, because you were at peace in your heart," he smiled at her, allowing the small drop of water in his palm to roll about. "You knew who you were and what you were going to do. As doubts crept in over the years you would lose the harmony, but it never took you long to put everything back in its place. This time is different." The water drop finally rolled off his hand and fell into the basin, sounding unusually loud. "Now there is nothing clear in your heart or mind. You are conflicted, lost, questioning. You do not know what to do; how to quiet the storm that rages within you. And in some ways, you no longer know who you are. Are you Heir to Earth? Are you Aria? Anakin? Surely you can see why the fountains are in the state they are."

The blonde slowly nodded, though her expression remained skeptical. That hadn't been the answer she'd been expecting. Besides, he was wrong on one count. She knew who she was. At least, she thought she did. However, the longer she considered his statement, the more she doubted. Maybe...maybe not. "I know what I'm doing," she finally whispered, looking away from the curious man. "The only thing I can to make things right."

"The _only_ thing?" he repeated, clearly skeptical. "Young one, there is very rarely a situation where there is _only_ one option. Besides, right and wrong are subjective. What you would consider wrong, your enemies call right. Think about it this way. A single Knight going into battle, embracing the Dark side in order to destroy all of their enemies and end a war, knowing they will not survive the battle and using that to justify their actions. To that Knight, things are being made right. But to the Knight's friends? Do you think they would agree?"

"No," the blonde admitted, quietly bracing herself. This Master clearly knew more than he was letting on. "But that doesn't make the Knight wrong."

"Perhaps," the older Jedi replied easily. "You see then what I mean. Right and wrong cannot be so easily defined. The Knight's former master could understand the decisions made and accept them. They would not consider the Knight wrong. However, if the Knight had a padawan, they might not be so flexible. Or maybe it is the other way around. There is no way to know."

"So I'll never know what I should do?" Anakin asked, raking a hand through her hair. "I'll never know what the right thing is?" When the Master opened his mouth she quickly waved it away. "Right being a relative term of course."

"Of course," he chuckled. "I'm not sure anyone can be sure that they are making the correct choice. There is always the chance that something can go wrong, and there is never a moment when every being involved can agree that a single action is the one that should be taken. However, there is a question that you can ask yourself to help decide if they path you have chosen is the right one for you." The blonde didn't reply, instead turning to face the old man. "Will the path you've chosen bring you peace?"

Peace. It had been a long time since Anakin had felt anything like that. The last time she could remember was when she had seen Obi-wan again after her three years on Earth. Standing in that meditation room, she had felt a calm that had eluded her most of her life. And it wasn't just because she was back with the Jedi and no longer had to fear for her life. A large part of her contentment had come from knowing, at long last, that her friends were safe. That's what brought her peace.

The plan she had was hard. It was Dark. The blonde had no doubt that she would suffer and highly doubted that she would live. But if it worked, her friends would be safe. She wouldn't have to fear for them anymore. So yes, the path she had chosen would bring peace.

"Yes," she said quietly, not noticing the smile spread across the Master's face. "It will bring me peace." For a second she thought she felt a hand upon her shoulder, but when she looked she realized that she was alone in the room. Startled, she leapt to her feet and spun around, but there was no one to see. Just the calm and quiet music of the fountains, each one singing in the harmony that the blonde had always known. Taking a deep breath, the young Knight bowed to the room before grabbing her pack and quickly continuing on her way, again firm in her beliefs.

Finally reaching the hangar, Anakin snuck in carefully, using the Force to hide from the Jedi on guard. Part of her wanted to reach out and shake the man, yelling at him for his laxness, but she held herself in check. Instead she silently made her way through the maze of transportation, knowing exactly which one she needed. There was no telling when her absence would be discovered so she had to move as fast as possible.

Carefully stowing her pack in the pre-picked speeder, the blonde subtly used the Force to cause a disturbance in the hall. She had to bite her tongue again as the guard instantly left the hangar to investigate. If she ever came back, she was going to have some strong words with the Council.

Except she wasn't coming back, she reminded herself viciously as she swung into the speeder and quickly powered it up. They had forgiven her other departure because the Anakin-body had died in defense of the Council. This, a true abandonment of the Temple and Order, were not so easy to disregard. If she survived the death of her Grandmother, she still wouldn't be able to return. That was a fact she had accepted. If only her chest would stop aching at the thought.

Peeling out into Coruscant traffic before the guard could come back, Anakin took a deep breath for the first time in what felt like ages. She'd never been the kind of person to sit back and let things happen. The weeks of being stagnant in the Temple had nearly suffocated her. Yet now that she was moving, she felt almost free. Watching the city's lights flash past her still triggered unpleasant memories. The last time she'd done something like this, she'd been going to her death. For some reason, this time felt no different.

Rather then head straight for the ship yard, the blonde flew directly to Padme's residence. There was one thing she had to do before she could leave the planet. It wouldn't be easy, but she steeled herself for the debate that was to come. Surely the senator would be able to see the logic that the blonde was using. Well, probably not, but she could hope.

"Anakin," Padme said in surprise, getting off the couch as the blonde entered the condo. The senator was dressed for evening comfort, the bulge of her stomach just starting to become truly noticable. It was still hard to believe that she was a little over five months pregnant. "Is everything alright?" the raven-haired female asked, growing worried when the Jedi tried and failed to smile. "Come here, sit." Slowly, looking like every move hurt, the blonde obeyed, sitting carefully across from her wife. The former queen quickly poured them both some tea, growing worried when it was accepted without complaint. "Anakin, please, tell me what's wrong."

"You need to go to the Temple," the blonde suddenly said, voice quiet and rough. "Please, I know it's a lot to ask right now, but you need to go."

"Ani," Padme said quietly, her voice already telling the Jedi that she was going to refuse.

"I know," Anakin cut in quickly, voice nearly cracking. "I know this is an important time and that the Senate needs you, but you have to go." Her hands tightened around the teacup, but she made sure to keep her strength in check. She couldn't go around breaking anything she touched, after all. "I sent you the information on the pregnancy, so I won't repeat any of that, but you don't understand. Grandmother is not going to just conveniently forget that you are carrying my biological child. She's already broken the laws of Earth to get the throne, she won't hesitate to do it again. If she can't have me, she'll go after you and the child." Looking into the senator's eyes, the blonde allowed her shields to fall slightly, letting the other female see a fraction of the pain she felt. "Please, Padme, I can't...I can't lose you too." Adam's face flashed through her mind, blood trickling from the corner of his mouth. It was so sudden, Anakin couldn't stop the flinch and shattered the teacup in her hand, embedding shards in her palm.

"Ani!" Padme cried in shock, quickly leaping to her feet. She paused, though, when the blonde just glanced at her fist and the blood that was dripping from it. There was a numbness in the Jedi that frightened the senator. In all the years they had known each other, she had never seen that type of expression on her friend's face.

Slowly unclenching her fist, Anakin stared at the wounds and blood for a long moment before blatantly looking away. "Please," she whispered again, her gaze locked on the carpet, voice rough and ragged. For the first time, Padme could see just how tired the Jedi was. She was slumped over, like an impossibly heavy weight was pushing on her.

Despite her better judgment, the raven haired senator sat beside the blonde, carefully pulling her friend into a loose hug. She could feel the slight tremors that were racking the Jedi and wondered how long it had been since she had last slept. It was so unlike the Anakin that she had always known. "Alright," she said quietly. "I'll go."

The blonde's head shot up, eyes wide in surprise but it quickly transformed into relief. Without a word, she took Padme's hand in her uninjured one and gave a gentle squeeze. "Thank you," she croaked, trying to hide the tears in her eyes. Her relief was so strong that Padme would almost swear that she could actually feel it. "Thank you."

They sat together a little longer, quietly giving and receiving comfort. It wasn't until the blonde realized she was dozing off that she got to her feet again. "I know its late," she said briskly, pulling her mind back on to the issue at hand. "There's no reason for you to go right now. Just...promise me you'll head over tomorrow. Preferably before lunch so that Obi-wan can help, but-"

"I promise, Anakin," Padme interrupted fondly, giving her friend a smile that was tinged with sadness. "I'll come to the Temple as early as I can. Now, why don't you sleep here? You look exhausted." Which was actually an understatement, making the senator worry. Usually the blonde was good at hiding her real condition, so her being exhausted would make her look merely tired. Looking exhausted meant she was far, far beyond that.

"I am," Anakin huffed in a sarcastic laugh, worrying Padme even more, if that was possible. "But I can't sleep yet." Trying to smile, the Jedi just hoped she didn't set off too many alarm bells in her friend's mind. "There's one more thing I need to do. After that, I promise, I'll sleep for as long as I can." For a moment the two females stood still, the raven closely scrutinizing the blonde, but eventually she nodded in acceptance. With reluctant smiles the friends embraced, Padme steadfastly ignoring the feeling that she would never see the Jedi again.

"Remember," Anakin whispered in the senator's ear, giving a final squeeze before stepping away, forcing her back to remain straight. "Goodnight, my friend." Turning around, she quickly strode over to her speeder, but she paused at the last second and looked back at the person she was leaving behind. "You know," she said quietly, smiling faintly in the glow of the surrounding buildings. "I never told you this before, but I've always thought that if I had to be married to someone, I'd want it to be you. I'm sorry I can't love you the way you love me...but I do love you."

"I know," the raven smiled, ignoring the tears that were pricking at her eyes. "I've always known. But thank you for telling me." The blonde nodded, waving slightly before swinging into the speeder and peeling away to merge seamlessly into the upper level traffic. Padme watched her go, feeling dread settle into her stomach as her children shifted anxiously. She had no way of knowing that it would be a very long time before she saw her friend again, or that things would never be the same between them.

With a deep sigh, Anakin tried to resettle her mind. Having Padme agree had been strange and had thrown her off balance, but it was a good kind of problem. She was under no delusion that things with her Grandmother were going to be very different. If they managed to get through the whole meeting without someone drawing blood the blonde would probably die of shock. And the rest of her family was an entirely different problem. Some would be more subtle, but she had no doubt that she was going to be fighting for her life for several months. So having Padme agree wasn't worth worrying over. Instead she had to focus on what was to come.

Pulling into the launching port, the blonde left the speeder with a note that it was to be returned to the Jedi Temple. It wasn't uncommon for a Jedi to request return service for transport, so she was confidant that the vehicle would be returned. All she had to do was grab her pack and walk inside, knowing her shuttle was already waiting. It had taken a long time to secure a small ship that had a hyperdrive, but she'd managed. Now she just had to get there without anyone-

"Commander Skywalker!"

-seeing her. Trying not to look guilty, Anakin waved weakly to Cody as the clone glared at her, arms crossed across his chest. However, she froze when she saw the pack at his feet and R2D2 at his side. Fear gripped her and she sharply looked up, locking gazes with him. "You're not coming."

"Try and stop me then," he challenged, scowling fiercely. "I waited three long years to save you from that damn planet and now you're planning on going back with your tail between your leg. The Jedi refuse to see it, but I can and I'm coming with you."

"It's not what you think," she tried to argue but quickly cut herself off when he threw his hands up in frustration. Despite all the years they'd known each other, she'd never seen him so angry. Honestly, it was a little worrying.

"Don't give me that crap, sir," he snarled, eyes narrowed. "You're going back to Earth. I don't know why and, truthfully, I don't care. But I remind you, I was trained and conditioned to follow you. Not the Council, not the Order, you. Even when everyone else thought you dead and gone, I waited. I searched, I hunted, I never gave up because I knew that I belonged with you. That hasn't changed. So either I go with you or I take you down and drag you back to the Temple this moment. Choose."

For a long, bitter moment, the pair were silent. The clone was worried when he saw the blankness in his friend's gaze, but he held firm. She couldn't keep thinking and acting like she was all alone and no one would be there for her. He didn't hold it against the Jedi; they were non-confrontational and independant by default. But he could get in her face and he would when he felt she needed it.

"And R2?" the blonde suddenly asked, glancing at the little droid. It beeped and whistled at her for a moment, sounding very sarcastic to the clone. Whatever it said, though, brought a small smile to the Jedi's face. She stood there a moment longer, clearly thinking things through, before sighing and raking a hand through her hair. "Alright," she sighed. "Get on board. We have a long way to go and a short time to get there." Nodding, the clone grabbed his pack and boarded the shuttle, R2 rolling in right behind him. Anakin was the only one to pause, glancing back towards the Temple for a brief moment. Her heart was breaking again, but she was finally firm in her decision. It wasn't preferable, but it would bring her peace in the end. So instead she gentle reached into the Force and whispered two words into the ears of everyone she loved.

"I'm sorry."


	7. Epilogue

**...take them down from the inside**

Sighing, I put the book back on the shelf, silently grumbling about how the dress swirled around me. I'd brought my robes from the Temple but Grandmother had thrown a fit when I had worn one. She'd tried to burn them but I'd hidden them away in time, instead resigning myself to hours of lectures about how royalty must present itself. It was nothing I hadn't heard before, though now I am more aware of just how stupid most of our traditions are. However, there is a time to stand your ground and a time to bend, as Obi-wan had told me several times. This was a bending time, so I agreed to dress as Grandmother felt I should.

"Is something wrong, Commander?" Cody asked, watching me worriedly. I tried to smile, still not used to seeing the clone in the VanGuard armor. Thank the Force he wasn't required to wear their masks. From the look he gave me, my smile wasn't up to my usual standards. Instead of calling me on it though, he just nodded in understanding. "Your meeting with the royal advisors is in an hour," he said instead. "We should start towards the conference rooms now to avoid being late."

"Of course, thank you Cody," I tell him, letting the smile become honest. He simply nodded, falling into step behind me as I walked towards the library exit. If he stood closer to me than he would have at the Temple, neither of us mentioned it. The tight and constricting dress that I was wearing inhibited my movement enough to make me vulnerable. No doubt that was Grandmother's intention, but she'd underestimated what I could do with the Force. One trick I'd learned was how to use the Force to subtly stretch fabrics. The change wasn't obvious but it allowed me a freedom that any other female would not have.

Half way to the conference room we passed by a small patrol of Sith. As a teen I'd always wondered about the soldiers in black robes. Now I knew them better than I'd ever wanted. When I'd first met the squad that was stationed at the palace...things hadn't gone well. The VanGuards had to intervene in the end, but I still managed to kill four of the warriors. Needless to say, I wasn't their favorite royal. Although one of them was taking an uncomfortable amount of amusement in my reactions to them. He wasn't bad...for a Sith. But that was a matter for a different time. I needed to focus just to make it through each day without going on a rampage.

Commotion at the end of the hall caught my attention and I perked up slightly. I could hear a voice that sounded vaguely familiar, but I had a difficult time placing it. Cody shifted to walk even closer, making me sigh irritably under my breath. I _hated_ acting vulnerable. Then I spotted the source of the disturbance and felt my blood turn to ice. "Cody, back," I hissed quietly, eyes narrowing as I was spotted. "Let me handle this." Bracing myself, I came to a stop and held my head high. Hard to believe that we were still the same height.

Time had not been kind to my twin brother.

"Aria," Edward greeting, a sneer clinging to his words. I chose not to comment on the sound making him appear ugly, knowing it would only lead to a fight. Besides, despite the wrinkles and greying hair, he was still passably handsome. It was not his looks that had suffered the ravages of time, but the emotions I could feel rolling off of him made me sick to my stomach. The Prime Minister of Kamino had once said that I was powerful in the Force, but I hadn't thought about what that meant to the rest of my family. Now I had to wonder. Was my brother a Sith? He didn't feel like one, but there was a flavor that reminded me of them.

"Edward," I replied neutrally, watching him closely. It wouldn't be out of character for him to suddenly attack. Cody would defend me, I knew, but that was the last thing I wanted. Besides, my brother was surrounded by a small group of soldiers, each wearing his personal symbol. Guards, perhaps? But then, why so many? "Is there something I can do for you?" I almost smiled at his look of surprise. Of all my family members, he would be the one to actually adjust himself to who I am now, instead of continuing to treat me based on who I was. In many ways, I was counting on it.

"Grandmother said you had come crawling back," he quickly recovered, smirking. "I was curious what a whipped dog looked like." Involuntarily, I lightly clenched my jaw as his men laughed. So he was going to play like that. As Aria, those words would have sent me into an uncontrollable rage. As Anakin, though, they were mild irritants. However, my reaction had to be carefully executed. While it was harder to anger me, he still had a short fuse.

"I wouldn't know," I said mildly, carefully watching his face. He'd never been as good about hiding his thoughts and emotions. So far there had only been tiny twitches, showing surprise but no anger. "You must forgive me, but I don't recall crawling so I am unable to tell you what a whipped dog looks like." Ah, there it was. The slightest tightening around the eyes. I must have put too much sarcasm into my answer. Well, it had always been hard to find the proper balance with him. "I hope I have not pulled you away from anything important." Eyes smoothing out.

"Not really, no," he slowly admitted, a note of caution in his voice. Good, he was realizing that I was different from his memories. "The last two weeks have been a little busier than normal, pulling out of the war, but everything has settled down now." Now he was smirking, forcing me to calm myself. I'd have to meditate on my reactions to him. No one else had this effect on me, not even Grandmother. Was it because he was my twin? "You should come to the barracks, join in the celebration of our victory."

"An interesting victory," I mused, knowing full well that I would push too far but unable to stop myself. Yes, I was definitely going to need meditation. "Considering the Order never gave me up, nor have I denounced them." There it was, that little curl of his lips. He was angry. Hoping to stall the fight, I held up my hand, darkly laughing inside about how I could still rile him up and then shoot him down. "I have no desire to fight with you, brother." A blink and twitch; he hadn't been expecting that. No wonder, considering I never called him that before. "If you'll excuse me, I'm late to a meeting." Still making sure to give him a slight bow, I walked past him, every sense on alert for a strike. However, he let me pass without issue. That didn't stop his soldiers from glaring as I continued down the hall.

"That went well," Cody muttered once we were out of sight. His hand finally released the hilt of his sword, though it still rested on the pommel. I tried to hide a smile at the memory of the fit he'd had when he'd learned that he couldn't use his blaster. Though why Grandmother didn't authorize the reintroduction of pistols and rifles, I still wasn't sure.

"It actually did," I told him mildly, eyes focused down the hall. There were still slaves about, so I watched my words but wasn't overly concerned. They wouldn't tell anyone anything if not given a specific question. "He didn't attack me physically, so I count it as a win."

"Would he have?" the clone asked, slightly surprised. "You called him brother. Surely he would not attack family."

"You forget what my family is made of," I chided gently, glancing at him for a split-second. "Grandmother chose me as Heir because I was slightly more blood thirsty than my twin. Emphasis on slightly." Cody frowned as he finally understood what I was talking about. In my family, everyone had to watch their back. My own mother had already tried to stab me through the heart when she embraced me in welcome. Come to think of it, I needed to change that bandage soon.

There was no time though, as we came to the conference room. The advisors were already there, so I stifled my sigh and sat at the table as Cody stood behind me. Grandmother insisted I be brought up to date on the state of the planet, planning on forcing me to take up my duties as heir once more. To that end I had to sit through several meetings a week, each more boring than the last. It was so dry I actually caught myself dozing on occasion. Not that any of the advisors noticed. When it came to pretending to pay attention while really plotting everyone's painful demise, I was a pro. Of course, Obi-wan never knew that. I always told him that I was keeping myself entertained by counting mundane objects.

My patience was greater than it had ever been because of the Jedi, but it wasn't infinite. Eventually I couldn't stand to sit in the meeting a second longer and got to my feet abruptly, cutting an advisor off mid-word. Before they could say anything, I quickly left, Cody at my heels. There must have been something in my expression that warned everyone away, because we were given a wide berth in the halls. Even some of my siblings, upon seeing my expression, decided the other side of the palace would be safer.

It was only once I was safely ensconced in my rooms that I allowed the mask to fall. "I hate this place," I groaned, collapsing onto the ridiculously huge bed. The dress bunched up ominously, but I ignored it. Let it tear, then I could send it to the trash bin where it might do some actual good. Although that would mean needing to pick out a different dress for dinner, since Grandmother would be attending, along with my parents and Edward. So no, no tearing the dress. Dammit.

With my eyes closed I couldn't see Cody, but I could hear him moving around the room. He stopped to talk with R2 quietly and I had to smirk when the droid gave him an insulted whistle. They had the strangest relationship. Soon after I heard the clone settle at the desk that I had assigned him. Grandmother had thrown a fit when I'd insisted that my bodyguard share my room, but eventually I had won the argument. Therefore half the room belonged to him, which was perfectly fine. Even just my half was easily the size of several Jedi apartments. I wasn't sure I knew what to do with excess space any more.

"Commander," Cody said softly, careful as always of eavesdroppers. "Is this what our lives are going to be like from now on? Is this our future?"

Sighing, I swung off the bed gracefully and padded over to the balcony. Despite my abhorrence of the palace in general, I did love the view from my room. It looked out into the valley, clearly displaying the river and forests. As it was the Royal Forest I never had to worry about seeing troops pass by, leaving me with a relaxing scene at all time. "There's an ancient Earth phrase that you should become familiar with, Cody," I replied, leaning against the balcony. The wind gentle caressed my cheek, teasing a lock of hair from the tight style that my hairdresser had tortured it into. "If you can't beat them," I reached out as if to grab the view and pull it in, my mouth contorting into a sly and cutting smirk, "take them down from the inside."


End file.
